Lighthouse Motif

for Ariel

You’re right. You’re not Virginia Woolf.
You’re my Ariel
and I want to keep the rocks out of your pocket
and help you walk beside the water.

We have lived that sunken look in her eyes now
(you were cut open baring 2 children)
I barely survived 2 decades under water
but still knee deep in that knowing that happiness can’t be held
especially not with greedy grabby hands.

Thank you for reminding me of who I am
Witnessing me has never caused you to flinch too much
Loving me is easy is felt presence now
I spent half our time together afraid about how much more you read than me
How much thinner you were
How could you love me?
You’re ballerina articulated
Am I not lack of discipline personified in sloppy form?

Years answered
Our quiet agreements lived out
space for us too grand to be called romantic love
Our conversations clear spiritual blockages I’ve never been able to name on my own
The knowing between us doesn’t need the validation of matrimony or even cohabitation
We breathe just fine across state lines

Virginia Woolf is more than a punchline to a suicide joke I heard all through college.
we aren’t our narrative arcs either
We are and always will be pen pals in our sleep
our inside jokes- code
I will emanate to you from beyond this lifetime

Look for me in every birthday puff